Recent 3-Day Silent Retreat at IMS-Barre

Stress Reduction Program MBSR Graduates
#1

I recently did a 3-day Silent retreat. It was my first retreat and it was, well, difficult, in a word. I am an MBSR graduate from Winter 2013 and have been doing yoga 2-3x/week and meditation 1-3/week on top of that.

First off let me say the teachers and staff were excellent, the accommodations were lovely and the food was absolutely fantastic.

My concern was the physical and mental stress it put me through, I am a healthy 46 year old male and I have done a few all and half day retreats but never an over-nighter. The 6am-9pm schedule became grueling on day 2 and my body ached so much it became difficult to focus on my breath/or body/or sounds. I tried kneeling benches, sitting, and my usually cross legged pose making sure my knees were lower than my hips and as I said, am not a beginner (nor an experienced practitioner). I had more than one “what the f#$& am I doing here” moment and that really bothered me because in general i have really enjoyed my practice at home and with the MBSR community in Shrewsbury (the few times I have joined the 1/2 and full day retreats)

My last day was better but it may have been because i was headed home by midday? I don’t know, I wonder if a longer 5-7 day retreat would have made it easier as I may have had to “break through” some barrier with my mind and body?. Overall i loved the experience but really underestimated the physical duress.

Has anyone else encountered the same?
Thanks !

1 Like
#2

Michael,
I just completed the 8 day course in San Jose that had 36 hours of silence and a lot more sitting meditation than I was use to. I’m 59 and experienced some of what you described. I’m new to MBSR and meditation (7 months). I feel that sitting daily helped prepare me for the course. For me (and only for me), I’m going to work up to longer sitting and longer silence by proceeding slowly. I have no expectations anymore. Sounds like you were very aware!
jerry

#3

Hi Michael,

My first multi-day silent meditation experience was a Goenka 10-day retreat with daily sitting meditation for 10 hours/day (1 hour sessions with breaks between each one). Like yourself, I remember attempting to find a comfortable position on the mat/cushion or a kneeling bench and found no relief. I had pain in my hip, knees, and upper back so it was necessary to adjust my sitting position several times each hour. This continued for several days. Our task was to arrive at a point where we could sit for an hour without moving our body.

It wasn’t until the eighth day that I suddenly realized the tension being held in my body coming from the apprehension about doing the next sit. I’ll never forget that moment when I resolved to be mindful of the tension with the intention to relax the body/mind. At that instant, the pain stopped for a few seconds. That insight made it possible to start sitting the full hour without moving until the end of the retreat.

That said, don’t be bashful about asking the teacher(s) for help with your pain or anything else you may find uncomfortable. If necessary, ask to sit on a chair instead of a cushion. In short, take care of yourself.
ron